Special Contributors Archives

Inception by Matt Wedge – August 27, 2010
I get that it was supposed to be a little confusing, but I couldn’t even get up to use the bathroom. I did about thirty minutes into it and when I came back, Jenny couldn’t even explain to me what had happened because she was so confused and then this jerk in front of us turned around and shushed us! Rude! I was just trying to understand this crappy movie that everyone was going on about.

MacGruber by D. B. Bates – June 25, 2010
Remember when action movies were tough? Back before the Clinton liberals convinced everyone that a sensitive, ponytail-wearing, environment-loving “action hero” like Steven Seagal or a Frenchy like Jean-Claude Van Damme were worth watching, we had real heroes like Chuck Norris and Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time by Matt Wedge – June 25, 2010
Last night, Vicki was complaining that we never see any movies that she wants to see. So, trying to keep the peace (and keep getting a piece), I offered to go see anything she wanted at the second-run theater (I may be pussy whipped, but I’m not made of money). You can imagine how much I thought the night was going to suck when she wanted to see that Disney movie with the guy from the gay cowboy movie. But, I have to say, I’m not too proud to admit when I’m wrong, and brother, was I ever wrong. This movie freakin’ rocked!

Proposal, The by D. B. Bates – July 30, 2010
I sometimes wonder if my life would have turned out differently if I’d been a professional. Now, I had and still have a career as a homemaker. But aside from working two summers at Lebo’s Shoe store in high school, I never had a professional job. I was never a book editor like Margaret Tate (Sandra Bullock), so it’s not easy to relate to a character like that. I’d call her unrealistic — I certainly don’t know any women like her — but I can’t imagine a strong woman like Sandra Bullock not just starring in this movie but executive producing if she thought the main character didn’t accurately represent a certain kind of woman.